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June 30, 2008


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No matter what the mystery, I always blame the raccoons.

Susan McCarthy

It's true, raccoons are so often the guilty parties.

Law enforcement knows this.

So when agitated crime victims and witnesses, asked to provide a description, stammer, "I don't know... it was dark.... I know they were furry... black and white fur... there was something over their eyes... it happened so fast!" the investigators say "Uh HUH," and round up the local raccoons.

Which means that pandas may be getting away with some heinous stuff.

Andrew Brown

So groundhogs are still more distant cousins of the Alpine marmot? Do they whistle?

Susan McCarthy

They do whistle! It's an alarm call. In fact, some people call them whistlepigs.


it was a person

Susan McCarthy

You mean you suspect the most abundant large mammal in Arlington?

I was too dainty to suggest that at first, and then one of the eyewitnesses remarked that The Thing was too large to be human work. So I am sticking with raccoon.

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